Hawaii-Logo_White

Explaining Surrogacy to Children

We are frequently asked by surrogates and intended parents how to explain the surrogacy process to children.  There is no cookie-cutter approach to this discussion. You need to think about what is developmentally appropriate for your childrens’ age and your own family values. We decided to sit down with Surrogate Prizzilla to see how she explained surrogacy to her two children. 

Prizzilla’s children are both under the age of five, so she felt that a simple explanation was best. “I told them I was going to ‘cook’ a baby in my tummy for the baby’s parents, and I would give the baby to its parents when it was time. I told them my tummy was like an oven where the baby would ‘cook’ until it’s parents were ready to take it home.” Surprisingly for Prizzilla, both of her kids took it well and understood that they wouldn’t be getting another sibling. Prizzilla’s son now tells people “there’s a baby in mommy’s tummy… but it’s not ours!” 

Prizzilla with her husband and two young children.

We asked Prizzilla if she has any advice for future surrogates. She recommends to first ask your children what they already know about pregnancy and start from there. If you have older children, be open and honestly answer questions they may have. For younger children, Prizzilla recommends starting simply and talking about it a little every day in order to normalize the concept. “I talk to my kids about giving the baby to his daddies every day, and they’ve even met the intended parents.  So they know who we’re growing this baby for and who gets to take him home.” 

Prizzilla with her children at the 2019 Honolulu Pride Parade.

Remember, every family is different and what might work for one family may not work for yours. If you would like to learn more about this topic, check out our YouTube channel.  Also head over to our Instagram to enter our holiday giveaway to win a copy of Sarah A. Phillips’ book, “The Kangaroo Pouch” – a wonderful storybook that helps explain surrogacy to young children.

Related Blogs

How to Build a Great Matching Profile

Do my pictures need to be professionally done?  How much information do I need to share?  Why do surrogates keep passing up our profile?  There’s no such thing as an ideal matching profile, but here are some tips for building a strong profile that will give a clear impression to the right surrogate for you.…
Read More

Understanding the Matching Process

A surrogacy journey is comprised of ten major steps and we take pride in carrying Intended Parents through to the finish line.  Understandably, the matching process is often the main focus for most Intended Parents.  Every agency does it differently.   It is as much an art, as it is a structured process.   Here is a…
Read More

Preparing Your Finances

The average cost of a surrogacy journey is around $85,000. That is assuming you already have embryos ready to transfer into a gestational carrier. While we provided a comprehensive budget for you after an initial program consultation, most Intended Parents still need help putting together their finances for their journey. Did you know there are…
Read More

Why is there a waitlist?

Finding a qualified surrogate is no easy feat.  However, it seems to be taking longer than ever to get matched.  Pre-pandemic, Intended Parents waited an average of six months to be matched in our program.  Unfortunately, these timelines have extended to a year or more for some families.  So why the wait? Less Applicants Since…
Read More

Staying Organized During Your Surrogacy Journey

Whether you are a first time surrogate or a pro, staying organized is key to having a stress-free surrogacy experience.  With all the shots, supportive medications, doctors appointments and day to day life, staying on track and organized can seem difficult at times. We talked with Surrogate Ashley Bolger on the tips and tools that…
Read More

What Makes Us Different

Whether you are a first time or experienced surrogate, we want to make your experience with Hawaii Surrogacy Center one to remember. We know that you have a choice among agencies. What makes Hawaii Surrogacy different? Our CultureWe focus on providing friendly, local service. When we accept Intended Parents into our program, we let them…
Read More